I have two kids for my husband, we got married in 2011… I was 22 years and he lied that he was 32; meanwhile he was 39.
We did introduction and engagement; we were supposed to have gone to the registry, which never happened. He claimed that I wanted to tie him down, after I had my 1st son. He never contributes to anything in d house and when I complain, he would tie me up like an animal with his belts, tie my both hands and legs and beat me to a pulp.
I wanted to leave in 2013, but my family and friends said I should endure and consider what people would say.
His family hated me so much for reasons I don’t know, I am a Christian and he is a Muslim. Before I got pregnant for my 2nd child, I begged him to even have sex with me because we could stay for months without any contact. So I had to calculate my ovulation to beg him for sex and when he noticed I got pregnant, he beat me at every slightest opportunity.
His family never want to see me. When I put to bed, he didn’t pay for my bills; it was my mum who came over and paid. His excuse was that he was punishing me, for something I knew nothing about. When my baby was a year old, my husband started acting all nice and good and I was wondering if he had turned a new leaf, still, we never slept in the same room. Then I started having terrible nightmares.
He works in a bank and one day, he called me to say I shouldn’t look for him, that I should take care of the kids. Then I called his family to tell them what he said, they didn’t sound surprised at what I said.
After three days, precisely on a Sunday morning, someone knocked at the door as early as 6a.m and I was wondering if he was the one. I opened the door only to find out that police had surrounded the whole apartment. They arrested me and the kids that my husband defrauded the bank.
I wasn’t working at that time because he had told my former employer to sack me as he wanted me to face my family. On the day of the arrest, I called his family and told them I had been arrested, they never came or called me. My mum bailed me and the kids. On getting home I found out that he had used a ladder to climb into our flat through the last floor of a 3-storey building. He packed some of his clothes, documents and left with his car.
After few weeks, he called me that all his accounts had been blocked that he needed money to come back home. He said he would send someone to me; that I should go to my mum’s shop and ask her for assistance; little did I know he wanted to monitor me out of the house. He came to the house after I left and packed his remaining clothes. I knew someone entered the house immediately I got back. I asked the security guard in the house, he said my hubby came to the house. I had to throw all the food I had away because I didn’t know what was on his mind.
I still stayed in the house for 2 months. Our rent was due at that time and our last rent was paid by my step-dad.
One fateful day I decided to enter his room, I was looking for something then I opened his second wardrobe and found some fetish things with my name on them. I called pastors and they prayed for days and I was told that he wanted to do money ritual, but because of what happened in his office, he couldn’t complete it on time.
That was the day I left his house with my things to my mum’s house. I was in my mum’s house for a month, when my step-dad woke up at 11p.m and told me he didn’t want to see me in his house. He threw my things out of his house; I slept outside with the 2 kids that night, thinking I would have no choice than to go back to my hubby. I had nowhere to go. My uncle invited me to come and stay at his place for some time in Ajao estate and on that same day I got a job.
I am really confused about the whole situation. From all I have been through because of my husband, I can’t forgive him and to think that he is involved in charms for money ritual is the height of it.
I’m sure he doesn’t love me, neither does his family. Can I forgive him? He is the father of my children, should I go back to him for the kids’ sake? Please advise me.
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